The offender was a very fat hen pheasant that went straight through the Grille making a very large hole in the plastic decor and jamming itself against the radiator. When the boss arrived home, eight miles later, the pheasant was still jammed firmly under the bumper up against the cooling system.
Needless to say the bird was swiftly removed, has been cleaned and has joined the other two pheasants in the freezer along with two more that were shot today. They are all going to make a really splendid, bumper game casserole, in a manner of speaking.
Mind you it will be the most expensive casserole ever because the repairs are going to cost just shy of one hundred and fifty pounds. At 35 pence a cartridge I think the gun seems a cheaper alternative.
Never mind it's an ill wind and all that.